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New! Worldwide Teleconference April 15, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, understanding men, understanding women.
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teleconferenceLast Saturday, we launched our New Community Outreach Program with Prelude to a Dance: Secrets of Attraction via the Internet @ StartMeeting.com. Now you can join in on our discussions from anywhere in the World!

For our current schedule and details on how to get connected, visit Dr. Debi’s Page now!

In less than 24 hours … April 12, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, dating, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, marriage, research, sexuality, understanding men, understanding women.
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Secrets of Attraction? Huh?

You might think this info is for women who want to attract a man. And it is.

But mostly, this information is for those of us who “have” a man … and want to make sure our romance thrives!

Women attract men. That’s no secret.

However, most of us are clueless about what it is that attracts an emotionally and spiritually healthy man … and keeps him interested for a lifetime.

We erroneously believe it’s all about our physical appearance.

In less that 24 hours, I’ll be meeting with women (and men) from across the continent. Won’t you join us?

Prelude to a Dance: Secrets of Attraction
Saturday, April 13, 10:30 am – 12:00 pm

F*r*ee Tele-Conference
US Toll Number: 530-881-1212
Meeting ID: 939-502-393

Instructions:

  1. About 5 minutes before the scheduled date and time, dial into the conference line using the toll number listed above.
  2. When prompted, enter the meeting ID, followed by the pound key.
  3. To join the online meeting, follow the meeting link listed above, then press “Join.”
  4. On the next page, complete your name and email address, then press “Submit.”
  5. The system will guide you through the process to participate in the online meeting.

For easier access* to the call at the scheduled time, you might want to download the optional software in advance > launch wizard to download meeting dashboard.

I look forward to meeting you very soon!

Warmly, Dr. Debi

* For 24/7 technical issues, please contact StartMeeting at (800) 644-9070.

Prelude to a Dance: Secrets of Attraction April 9, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, Q & A, understanding men, understanding women.
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Saturday, April 13

10:30 am – 12:00 pm

Find out what qualities are most attractive to emotionally and spiritually healthy men, as well as the challenges women often encounter in maintaining these wonderful qualities.

Free Conference Call via StartMeeting.com

register now

Mistakes We’ve Made April 6, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, dating, Dr. Debi Smith, marriage, research, sexuality, understanding men, understanding women.
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your_brainIf you’re like me, you’ve probably heard some pretty discouraging info about the long-term viability of romance in the past few decades (probably fewer decades that I, depending on your age).

It seems that my predecessors – as well as many of my contemporary colleagues – are pessimists when it comes to romance. And I believe it’s time we learn the truth about the inherent need of man for woman – and the power of it all!

Our Mistakes

Psychology and Christianity have both been telling us that our romance can’t last. That it’s a “trick” of Mother Nature (our biology) designed to facilitate our attraction to one another and to compel us to mate … to perpetuate our species. However, “they” warn us that no one can stay on a romantic “high” forever.

When I was teaching at the university a few years ago, my department chair forwarded a student email message to me. She was looking for a professor who could assist her with some research she was doing about how harmful Hollywood’s romantic movies are to our relationships. Not long ago, my own pastor commented that Hollywood sets up unrealistic expectations for our relationships.

Our expectations are too high? Really, folks?

It seems to me that our expectations are too low! I replied to my department chair that I would be very happy to speak with the student about romantic movies, but that I would not be giving her the response she was seeking. And for the first time, I was tempted to write to my pastor! (Yes, believe it or not, I really am shy, especially about personal confrontation.)

First, I believe all the romantic films (the truly romantic, that is, not the gory, sexually inappropriate stuff) tap into our deepest desire for emotionally intimate connection with another human being. And the reality is, we do that best in the context of traditional marriage.

And although I must admit that I haven’t yet read his book, I believe professional counselor Tim Alan Gardner is right on in his approach:

A couple’s sexual relationship has a far higher purpose than pleasure or procreation. Scripture makes it clear that sex is the one thing on earth that joins two people into one. Now readers can learn how to approach marital sex in a way that brings the fulfillment of true oneness. Sacred Sex shows how they can experience a beautiful, God-ordained life of intimacy that blesses them far beyond the bedroom walls, serves as an act of worship to God, and touches their hearts and souls in ways they never could have imagined. ~ Amazon’s Book Description

Sex without romance is empty. However, the amazing combo of companionship, commitment, romance, and sex make for a truly divine experience! Yay, God!

Reconnect, fan the flames of love, and keep your romance alive and well. It can be done! Ask me how during your FREE phone consultation!

Meet Dr. Debi This Saturday! April 4, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, dating, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, marriage, understanding men.
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All New! Webinars
from Dr. Debi Smith

When it comes to the Dance of Romance, the Music Matters. Why? Because Music sets the emotional tone of your relationship.

This series of webinars is for Hopeful Romantic women who have questions about men. We’ll talk about the challenges of relationships … as well as unravel the Marvelous Mystery of Men!

The Music Matters
Saturday, April 6
10:30 am – 12:00 pm (PDT)
Pre-register: Free Preview!

Meet me on the web for this free preview of my new webinar series for women … all about men! We’ll have a chance to get to know one another and find out what questions we have about men.

  • Why won’t he talk to me?
  • Why does he do that?
  • Why won’t he commit?

“See” you there!

register now

Hoping for a Proposal? March 28, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, dating, Dr. Debi Smith, Events.
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the_proposal

If only we still knew how to “romance” like this!

If you are a single woman – or if you are already dating someone – and you live in Southern California, you are invited to join in on our newest Workshop Series, April 14th through June 30th, in Newport Beach.

Click here for details now!

New Workshop Series for Single Women March 26, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, Dr. Debi Smith.
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music_mattersWhen it comes to the Dance of Romance, the Music Matters.

Why? Because Music sets the emotional tone of your relationship.

This series of workshops is for Hopeful Romantic women who are currently unmarried, and who hope to be married “someday.”

We’ll talk about the challenges of dating as a Christian woman … as well as unravel the Marvelous Mystery of Men!

All dating and single ladies (ages 18 and older) are welcome!
Each workshop will begin promptly at 6:00 pm
and end promptly at 8:30 pm.
1000 Quail Street, Suite 150, Newport Beach, CA 92660

Get the details or PURCHASE YOUR SEASON PASS here!

Fan the Flames of Love! February 5, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in attachment, classes, dating, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, marriage, research, sexuality, understanding men, understanding women.
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valentine-175x180It’s time to fan the flames of love! This year, Valentines Day falls on a Thursday. That means you have the opportunity to SCORE TWICE this year.

Here’s how …

Give your Sweetie a romantic card and/or flowers on Thursday. Enclose a handwritten note telling her how much you love her and how important your relationship is to you. Then tell her that you really want to invest in your marriage. So you’ve arranged a babysitter for Saturday … and that you’re treating her to a Day of Romance and Fun @ Mariners Church … and you’re taking her Dancing* that night!

Then get ready to enjoy the Best Valentines Weekend Ever!

Cost: only $125/couple
NOTE: This limited-time offer expires @ 6:00 am on Monday, February 11, so don’t delay!

Make Sense of the Man You Love January 13, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in attachment, classes, dating, development, Dr. Debi Smith, recommended reading, research, sexuality, stonewalling, understanding men.
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Dr. Debi SmithMy goal is to help women understand the men they love. And to help men understand us better … or at least to not get freaked out by our emotions. Do you know what I mean?

Truth be told, women really don’t get guys. We don’t understand how they think, what they feel, or why they do the things they do. With three sons and two grandsons to my credit, as well as a lot of years studying about and working with men and their relationships, I think I’ve got the inside track on that one … but I’m still a girl, which means I don’t always have it right.

Of course, sometimes men have questions about women, too. In fact, there’s a rumor going around that we’re way to complicated to ever understand. Seriously. But there are some simple truths that can help you begin to make sense of what she wants … and how you can win points with her. You want to make the lady smile in your direction, right?

For the past 9 years, I’d been planning to write down what I’ve learned … so you could benefit from it, too. And in November 2012, I finally finished my third book on the Psychology of Men and Relationships.

As a Psychologist and former University Professor, I’ve read tons of books about relationships. Some of them were not the most pleasant way to spend an afternoon. And it seems that most books written for non-professionals are filled with … well, in a word … filler. That is, you get most of the info in the first couple of chapters, and after that you get to read redundant repetition. sigh

So my goal was to write something that would be an enjoyable read … something you’d actually want to read … all the way through to the end. And from the feedback I’ve received, I think I accomplished my goal! So I invite your to order your own copy of Dance With Me: a hopeful romantic interprets Ephesians 5; attend Dance With Me: Relationship Workshops for Men, Women, and Couples; or sign up for our FREE SEMINARS!

Enjoy!

Warmly,
Dr. Debi Smith

Newport Beach, California

God designed man to … January 12, 2013

Posted by occhristiancounseling in classes, Dr. Debi Smith, Events, recommended reading, sexuality, understanding men.
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by Dr. Debi Smith

shavingAs part of the curse noted in Genesis 3 – the woman’s desire is to control, manage, and fix her husband. And that man will toil his life away. And they won’t get along with one another. That doesn’t sound so good now, does it?

However, we can now give thanks to the Lord for the hope we have through our faith in Jesus Christ, who sets things right again. In Ephesians 5, we learn that man is to love his wife and be willing to die for her … as Christ died for the Church.  So far, that sounds like the Best Good Deal for Womankind.  But that’s not all there is to it.

There’s that part about the wife’s submission, remember?

Clearly, we are created as partners. Essential partners in the work of the Kingdom of God. Through Christ, we are redeemed to fulfill the purpose for which we were created. Man is the Leader, and woman is the Follower. He’s not a dictator, and she’s not a silent, meaningless subject. More about that later …

Fortunately, when we get things back in their proper, Heavenly perspective, man has what he needs to do his job, to live out his life doing what God designed him to do. And man was created to be especially adept at four things (five, if you count parallel parking): protecting, providing, problem-solving, and pleasing. Yes, they all begin with the letter “p.” That makes it easier to remember. How cool is that?

Ephesians 5 Workshops & Free Seminars
by Dr. Debi Smith
for men, women, & couples